Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

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What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

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a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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What happened when the mailman shot the plumber? The plumber died.

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how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

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Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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Q: Why didn't the little boy get his bike for christmas? A: He died from cancer

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

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what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

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Please? No.

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Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

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How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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