(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because due to the crashing economy he feels the need tom travel far distanced for work and food to support his growing family, this causes him to take dangerous routes of travel through hazardous areas with fast moving automobiles that potential have the chance to kill or severely Maine the distressed chicken. Not only does he have to cross these roads twice a day he is also under the added pressure of many millions of people questions why he takes such chivalrous actions to save the his future descent and the steep decline in the population of chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the crocodile cross the road? It is actually highly improbable that such a large reptile would be in a residential area where such roads would exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is red and bad for your teeth? A BRICK!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Have you heard about the angry chef? He beat his children

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Romeny or Obama? Obamney

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Helen Keller say when she fell off a cliff? That never happened. I just checked Wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how many blondes did it take to fix a nuclear reactor? 1 she was a black japanese rapist

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops