What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A fat guy. - Louis

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

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What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

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shut up iggy

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cliché rebecca black joke.

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

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Patient: "Doctor I think I might be a homosexual." Doctor: "How can you tell?" Patient: "RAAIIINNBOOOOWW!!!"

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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A man once had a monkey, and it made him very happy. then one day, his monkey ran away. So the man was very sad and screamed, "I knew i should have broken the monkey's legs!!"

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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