George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

my mom died because she was morbidly obese

When is a door not a door? Never.

What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

if quiz is quizzal whats test?

What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice.

Why does the St. Johns River flow north? Because Georgia Sucks.

MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...