1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you call a blue colored dog with seven legs, that oinks? not a dog...

thumb_up thumb_down -42

An irish man walks into a bar... Hes met with an intervention of family and friends who are all very concerned about his drinking problem and well being.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Whats worse than 1 bee sting... 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings... The hollacaust Whats worse than the hollacaust... 3 BEE STINGS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Jesse gets so many ladies

thumb_up thumb_down -48

A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it’s all play.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops