Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

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A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

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why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

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Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

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Yo mama's fat.

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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Roses come in a variety of colors.

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Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

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Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

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Why was the sex offender sweating in the playground? Because he was pushing his over weight son on the swing.

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If a quiz is a quizical then what is a test? an Exam.

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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