Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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A Mexican, a black man and a Pakistani walk into a bar. Everyone immediately runs out seeing the potential danger in the situation that's about to unfold.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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if your paddling a backwards canoe up a waterfall and it loses its wheel, how many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house? the answer is 17 because aliens are allgeric to cows and mustard.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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did you hear about the 2 car pile up by wal-mart? 50 mexicans dies

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I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

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raisin boogers

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216-409-7176 Call me.

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

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How do you get an alien baby to sleep? Well, first you need to get an alien baby.

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What do you call a mother who is also your aunt and a father who is also your uncle? Incest

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What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

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are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

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SCENES WHEN TOM O'SHEA GETS STABBED IN PRISON AFTER STEALING THE WHEELS OFF AN AMBULANCE

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

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Sally was ugly like a shaven babboon So she created her own little cacoon And within a week she finally emerged And she smelled like shit what a psycho

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Yo momma is so ugly, that she has no mirrors in her home to avoid the feeling of disgust and sadness she gets whenever she sees her reflexion

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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