69

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Two olives are sitting on a table. One loses his balance and rolls off. The other calls down to it, "Oh my gosh, are you okay?" And the olive yells up, "No. I just rolled off a friggin table."

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There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

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what is juicy and smells like juice,but it is not juice? juice. i lied about it not being juice.

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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Knock knock ... *No ones home*

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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What's worse then one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse then two bee stings? The Holocaust . What worse then the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Jesus sacrificed his life to prove that he was immortal. So where does the part where he gets nailed to a stick and beaten the shit out of fit in?

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What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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Ken wins!

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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Knock knock "Who's there?" Blood on the Dance Floor "Ha!"

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I went to the principle's office because I had a hard time reading They tried to tell me I was lesdistic

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F Detroit! I'm more of a Bulls fan

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We can never ask enough hypothetical questions, can we? Well?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

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Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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