Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Robert fall off his bike?? Because he was a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

thumb_up thumb_down

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

thumb_up thumb_down

what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

thumb_up thumb_down

When the loaf of bread crashed the car the wife was mad. What do you think she did? She put Nutella on him toasted him and then ate him

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than the holocaust? Giovanna Plowman.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

thumb_up thumb_down

Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are red and have big balls woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

thumb_up thumb_down

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down

4 men walk into a bar... Don't jump to conclusions! They were gay.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops