I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's the police, they ask the questions.

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Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

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What's the difference between and Jew and pizza?!?!?! Jews are people and pizza is a food product :D

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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Velcro. What a rip off.

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Donald Trump

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Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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