Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

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A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

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What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

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Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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There are two monkeys sittingn a bathtub. The first one says, "Scratch my back Mack." The second one says, "That's okay Joe I've got a radio of my own." (laugh like you think it is funny)

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Why did the girl get robbed? Because her door was unlocked.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

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How do you get a one armed Pollack out of a tree? Hold his family at gunpoint.

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civil rights

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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