What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

so... how about that airplane food

Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

i died. new product by steve jobs

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

What did the man with aids say? "I'm dying and there is nothing you can do about it"

why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

I have the answer to why the child stepped on a ball-he was dumb

John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy wishes the same.

What's worse than World War II? World War III.

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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