Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

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i lost the game

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

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What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

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What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

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Why are all blondes dumb? They are not all dumb but constant bullying just saying blondes are just pretty gives them that illogical stereo type

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

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A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

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Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

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knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

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The government

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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