What did Jean Luc Picard say to Data when he saw a broken Janome Overlocker? Make it Sew

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Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

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Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

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mark lawson likes boys

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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A Black Man Walks Into A Club.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

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what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

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So two clowns walk into a bar... . . . . . . . . . . They died

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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kieran scott has a huge back

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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What did the Pope say to the old homeless man who asked him for a blessing? Hahaha, no I won't give you a blessing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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