How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

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Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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