An american man, chinese man, black man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar. The american man says i want to show you guys a trick, so they go to the empire state building and the american man jumps off the side and comes back up alive. He tells them i will do it one more time, watch closely. So he jumps off and comes back alive. The american guy tells the chinese man to do it. So the chinese guy jumps off and dies. Then the american guy tells the mexican to jumps off, sonhe does it. The mexican man dies and the black guy is told to do it and he is afraid, but still does it, he dies. The american man goes back to the bar and the barkeep says "Superman you can be a real dick when your drunk!"

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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Why did it die Nothing died

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Ebola

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

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Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

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what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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E= McVagina

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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hi michael

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A typical out-door activity.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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