What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

Z.

Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

Why did Billy drop his ice cream?? He got hit by a truck.

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

baby seal walks into a club

A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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