All the other dinosaurs were laughing and teasing the tyrannosaurus because of his tiny arms. They left and the T.rex was sobbing uncontrollably next to a giant fern. "What's the matter little fellow?" said Jesus. The crying dinosaur looked down and said "I That's the end of my stupid puppet show, cuz I couldn't think of anything a blubbering dinosaur would say to our Lord and saviour.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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a jew walks out of a furnace

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

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What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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There was a fat man crying. I just told him the local Mc D's was arson attacked.

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Why did the black man get sent to prison? He had committed many crimes and was finally caught by the police.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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