Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

so dont touch it.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

Tough crowd tonight...

Knock Knock Who's There AT&T Guy Mom it's for you

a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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