Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

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Once upon a time there was man named Bob. He liked bacon. So he ate some. And he like it. So he got some more and ate it. Then he went an played THE GAME.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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A priest walks into a bakers and asks for a loaf of bread , the baker asks "white or brown" the priest replies "it does not matter Sir I have my bike outside".

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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kid: can i go to the bathroom? teacher: you have to say the alphabet first. kid: ugh. fine. a.b.c.d.e.f.g.h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.q.r.s.t.u.v.w.x.y.z teacher: what happened to the p? the kid bows his head in shame sits back down as the entire class laughs at him.

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Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

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69

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

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A cow walks into a bar and said, "Bartender give me a glass of milk!"

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Where did the homeless man sleep? A rather nice hotel with fluffy pilloes

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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http://citizenmcgeedotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/borat-banana-hammock.jpg?w=300

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Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on the trampoline

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So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

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OHIO DRIVERS.......THAT IS ALL......

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Why did the Dentist recommend Oral B? He had been paid by the company and thus legally bound to do so.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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