A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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Your mumma is so fat she was mistaken for an opera singer in a quite awkward confrontation. she was embarrassed and walked out crying

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A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

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Dyslexics are teople poo

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? the NBA

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? A question and answering session of information used to test knowledge of a specific idea or person.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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What did the parrot say to the dumb man? Nothing

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Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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What do you say to a black man on the street? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops