What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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BIM slowly fucks old women in the dark so they think its rape then he slips his hand up there ass and rips out there heart

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Andy Carrol

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c:

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What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

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Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

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knock, knock who's there owls owls who thats right owls who

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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