What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats small and tickles? pubic lice

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

refridgrator

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats good about poland... fukk all

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

thumb_up thumb_down +2

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: A funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops