Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 murdered her little sister

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

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Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

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Why couldn't Paul see. He got stabbed in the eye by two mexicans

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knock knock who's there peedo peedo who scissors

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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