A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a gay man? Homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a dad farts in the woods nothing else happens

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't the black man participate in the running category of the Olympics? Because he had no legs, he was referred to the Special Olympics, instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't Timmy have a girlfriend ??? Because he's a Fruit bowl !

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you get a black man out of KFC? Tell him to get out

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops