What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're adopted and Santa Claus isn't real

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

a guy walked into my house and asked "why do you do the beep test every arvo?" i suddenly replied, im matt minors i get chicks

A women in the kitchen.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What do you call a fat kid who eats twinkies. Otto Hintz`````

A nun with shoes on walks into a bar with her husband.

-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when the elephants were coming? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when the elephants were coming? Here come the plums! (She was color blind.)

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Losing a family member in 9/11.

Roses are red, foxes are clever, I like your butt, let me touch it forever!

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

Why did the man's motorcycle not move when the street light turned green? Because it was a filing cabinet.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

What's big, red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Whats worse than a bullet in the head? i have no idea, i have never been shot in the head so i'm not sure what to compare it to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...