A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

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What's 9 + 10 19

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A man walked into a bar. He said ow.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your hair smells nice, especially when woven into a sweater.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

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Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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