how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

why did the man lose his testicle? he had cancer

Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

Roses are red, foxes are clever, I like your butt, let me touch it forever!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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