What do you call the black president? Mr.President

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

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A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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