What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

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Q: Why can't Eric drive a car? A: Because Eric is a rock

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Doctor, I am afraid of doctors, I dont even dare seek them up. Janitor: Thats quite apparent... Dr.Moral:

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Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

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hey bill!

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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knock knock. who's there myhairs myhairs who myhairs fallen out

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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Your so fat that you have a 75% chance increase of dying from congenital heart failure.

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What did Jesus say when he walked on water? I'm drowning

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops