Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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An asian loses to you in starcraft..

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Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

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what do you call jerry sandusky with a kid in a shower jerry sandusky

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Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? words

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

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What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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