Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

whats white and pointless? chalk.

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

You: Mike and Steve were playing chess, who won? Them: Mike You: no, it was steve

Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

I pooped.

A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

Yo mamas so fat.

What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

Who wants pizza crusts?

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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