- Anti Joke

what does a chair look like? a chair.

do you like walffles?Yes I like walffles!

Why did the white bartender kick out a black man and his Mexican friend out of the bar? It was closing time

knock, knock whos there child molestor

A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

whats 69+2? 71

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was osama bin laden

Knock knock Who's there? Impatient Hellen Keller. Impatient Hellen Keller who? ...

How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

quik reply fuckker, im at the room on the left at the uh... forgot anywayss third floor, to the end of the hospital, btw, I told The Goat and Fingern to wait for you at the entrance, and I paid them to kick your ass... WHOS YOUR DADDY! Well soon ill be your dad and the father of your sisters first kid! Man, relax, I told them to just drag you outside and kick you in the nuts, then some atomixc elbows and make u bleed... Your suufering is none of use of me if your ded, plz reply abut your sufferage when they are done, u really think id fight your dirty shit yourself? I AM THE LEADer THE ONE WHO KNOcKS! I DONT LIKE THE FIGHT! PEOPLE FIGHT FOR ME! IN MY NamEN MY GLORY!! Amen, you will soon become an uncle... Nah, tell your sis its a joke, I already told her I insist bangign her look at the pone Goat has in his poket, her last responz is "now?" and two smileys with eyes poppingg XD Seriously, if they are not already kicking your ass... Well, they sent me a pic, I suppose you will end up at the hospital too, looks bad kid... But you know the goat, that kid wants to kill, and probably has... ill let theem know that if thhhhey kill youu, they hmmm... then I cantt beat you um mysepf, so no killins in my name, reelas ill call em, but you are just bruise now, I want moar blood. Nero Metal, the coldest leader, of the universe. (dat tok like 6 mins to tyype so wort it, if you diee, i dont responsible for the goat, but i think finger will stop him zoon.

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Roxanne's hat looks like a condom

what did the african child get for his birthday? water, it is a very scare resource were he comes from and is considered a great present

Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

What did the tomato say to the ketchup? Nothing both vegetables and condiments are inanimate objects, therefore cannot speak

What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

Do you like cats? You gotta be kitten me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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