Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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Your momma's so fat she died five years ago.

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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Of course, first door on your left

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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