An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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You

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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