How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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what sucks? things that suck

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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PATHETIC

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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Did you hear about the man who fell out of an aeroplane at 2000 feet? He was taking part in a charity skydive to raise money for his dying brother, a chronic sufferer of cystic fibrosis.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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