What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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Apple.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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