Andy Carrol

Why can't George Washington drive? Because he died!

Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

What did the Lightning Bolt say to the Thunder Cloud? WATTSup?

What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Q: What did the black man say to the other black man? A: Nothing. They didn't know each other.

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

VAGINA.

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

Whats green and turns red at the push of a button A frog in a blender

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

Your mom's so old she sometimes uses outdated racial slurs loudly in public. It can get pretty embarrassing.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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