Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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What do you say to a friend when they're feeling down? The Game

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What is the difference between a Mexican man and a bench? The Mexican man is a human being, thus being sentient and able to partake in social activities, such as receiving education, meeting people, getting a job, raising a family, and getting somewhere in life. The bench cannot do anything. It is inanimate and is meant to be sat on.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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What do you call a sleeping bull? Don't call him anything and back away slowly.

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What's funnier than 68 69

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What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

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Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

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What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

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What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a brick at him!

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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whats more annoying than being raped by a giant scorpian? finding out that half the anti-jokes are terrible

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What do you get when you cross Sir Elton John with a sabertooth tiger. I don't know but you better keep it away from your ass.

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I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops