Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, It's still in its pen.

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what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

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A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

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what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

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Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

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A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

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What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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there was a blind kid and a man wearing a WWJD & Livstrong bracelet touched his eyes and he could see. He wasn't used to the light and walked into traffic and died instantly.

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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