When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

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Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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You so dumb that you weighed 100 pounds and ate a peanut and weighed 500 pounds!

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whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

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What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

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So, a guy sees a guy, and asks that guy if he's seen a guy who knew this guy who saw this guy who killed this guy, who knew a guy who is Barack Obama's best friend. Oh wait, Barack Obama doesn't have any friends.

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

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Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Wanna hear a joke? Yes Then go on the internet and find some jokes.

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A white person at Harvard

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No Neither have I

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Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

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you know what is so funny?! jokes..................................

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops