How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

Knock knock Get off my porch.

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

9

What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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