What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

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A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his cow? Where's my wife?

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

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What do you cal it when a black person gets married to a white person inner racial marriage

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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What is a black guy's favorite hobby? Stamp collecting.

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There is a blonde a Burnett and a red head. Life goes on.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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