Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

Women's rights

How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

did you know, that a Bear has 42 teeth? massive erection.

What did hitler say to the bartender? Nothing he's dead.

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

Q: Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: She had no arms... Q: Knock Knock! Q: Who's there? A: NOT SARA! --- Q: Okay... What song does Sara sing to her arms? A: Somebody That I Used To Know... --- Now. If you're happy and you know it clap your... nevermind O_O

Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

What do u call a black astronaut? An astronaut, you racist prick

what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

There's a car about to hit me.

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

It was a warm summer day when justin beiber got hit by the bus everyone was cheering

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Why couldn't the girl brush her hair? Because she had leukemia

why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

why are black people good at basketball cuz their tall

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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