What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

At least I dont have AIDS.

Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

What is orange and smells like a jewish cat. Nothing

Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

Are you from Tennessee? Because you accent is really not hiding it

Knock Knock Go Away

Misner is a twat.

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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