Roses are red, Violets are red, Shit I'm bleeding.

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What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

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Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Moe: What's the difference between blue paint and red paint? Ben: I couldn't tell you, I'm blind. Moe was so embarrassed by his unintentional rudeness that he apologized to Ben and walked away.

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tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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What happen when you put a Ciara and a Charlie together? They have sex.

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Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

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What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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