Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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you know whats not funny? the Holocaust

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What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why couldn't Harry Potter get a job at Mc Donalds? Because he isn't real.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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Do you want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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A midget walks under a bar

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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