What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Pull my finger ouch..

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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A horse walks into a barn.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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pickle sniffer

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

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A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

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Mark Wilson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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