When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened when the man killed a baby? He was captured by the authorities and sentenced to life in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What was even more disgusting than the holocaust? Lucy's new shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what is big and green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A snooker table

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

1.Roses Are Gray, Violets Are Gray. I Am A Dog. Can I Eat Your Leg? 2.What Did The Sandwiches Say To The Grilled Cheese? Nothing. Sandwiches Can't Talk Due to The Lack Of Organs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are orange Thats odd, my violets are somehow orange

thumb_up thumb_down -1

John Stamos.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Well babies don't have the strength or coordination to hold a paint brush, so you may need to call some painters.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops