Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Why are you late? Sorry, I would have been here sooner, only I wasn't.

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Q.why is there so much drama? A.it's a reality tv show.

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Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

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What do you call a new born baby ? Whatever name you and your partner have agreed upon after months of sifting through baby names.

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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He walked in a bar

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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How do you get your girlfriend's yapping Chihuahua to be quiet? Throw it through a window.

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- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

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What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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69

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

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What is 17 meters, squared? A square.

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Why do animals on the side of the road stink? Well they don't, you just think they do when in reality all it is, is there insides rottening From prevous days of exposen of the air now as far as I know all the little baby squrriel Wanted was it get his nuts in the road and it bring back to his starving family counting on him to bring Food to the tree next thing you know a soccer mom's van ran the poor baby squirrel over. Now me knowing this squirrel myself (don't ask me how) he wanted to go out in style you know get ran over by a mustang or a lambo not some bitch ass mini van with sliding doors and a dvd player convinit for the kids to watch spongebob.... man I bet that squrriel was pissed!

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ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

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what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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