In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly shits on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Facebook How i met my mother

The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

Wats rong with yo leg.....

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

there was a pre school teacher and he told the children to draw a squirell. One boy breaks into tears because his entire family was slaughtered by a pack of squirrels. This upset the teacher

Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

why did the boy drop his ice-cream? because he got hit by a bus

you first

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

who ever is reading this....

Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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