Did you know Helen Keller had a playhouse in her backyard? Well if you didn't, it was quite nice. I was her neighbor.

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

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Whats sadder than a lost baby deer? Im too lazy too think of the rest of the joke.

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Knock knock Who is there Banana Banana who Knock knock Who's there Banana Banana who Knock knock WHO'S THERE orange ...orange who Orange you glad I'm a cop here to tell you your family died in a horrible mask murdering and didn't say bannana again?

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he was dead

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whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

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There are two men waiting in line at the supermarket. One of the men reaches forwards and taps the other one on the shoulder. He says, "You dropped your wallet.". He picks up his wallet and both of the men continue on with their day.

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Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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whats the dif...mexicans are gay

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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